The world of Premiership transfer gossip is full of nonsense, but some nonsense is more interesting that the other nonsense. Speculation is rife in the likes of the Mirror, Daily Mail, Times, Sun andâ€¦ errâ€¦ Tribal Football all do their best to predict and/or completely make up the future.
Hereâ€™s our opinion on the Premiership transfer rumours weâ€™ve read in the papers and around the netâ€¦ and if you have any thoughts, pop em in the comments.
West Ham will complete the Â£6m signing of Newcastle midfielder Kieron Dyer on Thursday.CaughtOffside Says: And thus the Hammers continue signing anyone who will agree to come to them. For a club that could use a bit of stability and consistency, Kieron Dyer is probably the last guy you want to look to.
Barcelona insist Deco is not going to Chelsea or anywhere else.
CaughtOffside Says: Shame, because…wait that’s not a shame at all.
Reading manager Steve Coppell is preparing a Â£2m bid for Fulham defender Liam Rosenior.
CaughtOffside Says: We just put this here so Reading fans can join in the Transfer Window fun too. Rosenior is a reasonable player. So… that’s quite exciting, right?
Middlesbrough hope to beat Fulham to the signature of Portsmouth’s Sean Davis, after offering Â£2m for the midfielder. Portsmouth are also rumoured to be offering Davis and 10 million for Yakubu.
CaughtOffside Says: 10 million and a mediocre midfielder won’t help. It’s all over already.
Sunderland and Boro are fighting it out to sign Tottenham striker Mido for Â£6m.
CaughtOffside Says: If Keane can play Chopra and Mido up front all season, we just don’t see Sunderland going down at all. The Egyptian plays well and scores as long as he starts every week Boro? See above.
Newcastle manager Sam Allardyce is prepared to splash out Â£3m to sign Fulham’s midfield powerhouse Papa Bouba Diop.
CaughtOffside Says: If there was ever a player who should have ALLARDYCE tattooed on his forehead, it’s Papa Diop. Sam would probably give him his
corrupt first son Craig just to get a chance at The Wardrobe.
Derby boss Billy Davies has slapped a Â£5m price tag on Giles Barnes, who is attracting interest from West Ham and Tottenham.
CaughtOffside Says: Well, they just paid 10 million for 12 year old Gareth Bale and 16 million for Darren Bent. So Billy could probably add a zero to that number and still find himself without his star prospect at the start of the season.
Moyes will also move for Manchester United’s Alan Smith if James Beattie joins Sheffield United, while he also is keeping one eye on Wigan left back and Everton supporter Leighton Baines.
CaughtOffside Says: Alan Smith is the opposite of James Beattie. Hard working, professional, and not a chufty mound of lard. Baines is a good shout too, assuming the club can pull their finger out long enough to sign a talented player who genuinely supported them as a wee lad.
Portsmouth are trying to resurrect a deal for Seville striker Frederic Kanoute.
CaughtOffside Says: Freddie is a quality player who Harry knows well, he’s scoring bags for one of the best and most attacking teams in Europe, and previously only had an average goal rate for some pretty mediocre West Ham and Tottenham clubs. So if Pompey fans are as good as they think they are, this one makes sense.
West Ham may have moved a step closer to signing striker Eidur Gudjohnsen, who has been left out of Barcelona’s tour of Asia.
CaughtOffside Says: There’s no reason to believe Eidur Gudjohnsen is a money-grubbing mercenary. Other than the fact that he wouldn’t answer a simple question about whether he bleaches his pubes and his hair when we talked to him in November.