The world of Premiership transfer gossip is full of nonsense, but some nonsense is more interesting that the other nonsense. Speculation is rife in the likes of the Mirror, Daily Mail, Times, Sun andâ€¦ errâ€¦ Tribal Football all do their best to predict and/or completely make up the future.
Hereâ€™s our opinion on the Premiership transfer rumours weâ€™ve read in the papers and around the netâ€¦ and if you have any thoughts, pop em in the comments.
Chelsea will not break the bank to bring Seville’s Â£20m-rated Daniel Alves to the club.
CaughtOffside Says: That’s because spending 20 million tends not to break the bank of billionaires. So go ahead and get your “Alves” Chelsea shirts now.
Newcastle’s Nolberto Solano wants to leave the club, with West Ham his alleged preferred destination.
CaughtOffside Says: Hmm we thought Sam would have done everything to keep Solano. Set pieces are a favourite of the Samster, and you’d be hard pressed to do better than Nobby. Then again, he’s like 54.
Stewart Downing admits he has ambitions beyond Middlesbrough, despite rejecting Spurs numerous times.
CaughtOffside Says: Ol’ Stu seems a right homebody, and who can blame him when he lives in gorgeous Middlesbrough?
Derby have agreed terms with Finnish midfielder Mika Vayrynen over a possible move from PSV Eindhoven.
CaughtOffside Says: Excellent. Because he may or may not be good and may or may not help them fight for relegation, and we may or may not have never heard of him.
Toffees boss David Moyes is set to step up his efforts to sign Middlesbrough striker Yakubu.
CaughtOffside Says: He better, as Moyes has yet to satisfy supporters who want to see more ambition in the transfer market.
The Derby County and Everton are also interested in Palermo’s Polish striker Radoslaw Matusiak.
CaughtOffside Says: That’ll do it.
Middlesbrough have beaten Sunderland, Birmingham and Fulham to the Â£6m signing of Tottenham’s Egyptian striker Mido.
CaughtOffside Says: Southgate has successfully built the partnership (Downing crossing to Mido’s head) that Spurs were looking for themselves. If it works out well, that decision to spend 16 million on a striker and not a left midfielder will look even better.
Portsmouth striker Lomano LuaLua is poised to join Greek side Olympiakos for Â£2.8m.
CaughtOffside Says: Shame, we like Lua Lua and he’s always been a solid Premier League performer. Surely someone who needs a decent striker could step in here, perhaps Spurs?