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Newcastle United’s Ground Renamed: Mike Ashley’s Idiocy Knows No Bounds

by Christian Bailey

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Oh Sweet Jesus!

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Newcastle United have angered fans with plans to rename their ground the sportsdirect.com@St James’ Park Stadium until the end of the season.
The Championship club said last month they were looking for offers for the naming rights to St James’ Park, their home for 117 years.
Sportswear retailer Sports Direct is controlled by Newcastle owner Mike Ashley, who has said he is committed to the club after failing to find anyone prepared to meet his 80 million pounds asking price.
“We will showcase Sports Direct until the end of the season,” managing director Derek Llambias told the BBC.

“I’m sure we’re going to get a sponsor in for next season.”
He said, however, that the existing St James’ Park name would remain as part of any future renaming.
Supporters gave the announcement a frosty reception on the Newcastle Chronicle website.
“The idea of turning the history of St James’ Park into something that resembles an e-mail address absolutely beggars belief,” said Mark Jensen, editor of United fanzine The Mag. (Four Four Two)

In some ways you have to hand it to Mike Ashley (or Mr Odious and Obese as we coined him at COS Towers), just when you thought it couldn’t become any more of an object of derision and hatred he manages to up the bar that little bit more.

The idea of renaming a stadium, not a new one but the one that has been the club’s home for over a century, is disgraceful enough as it is, but to then do so in such a despicable and frankly amateurish attempt at self promotion just beggars belief.

I mean I was seriously shocked when I read this article. At first I thought it just had to be a joke. The name of the ground is essentially nothing more than a pseudo email address constructed in a half arsed way to attract attention to Mr Ashley’s business empire.

Once again I feel nothing but pity and support to the masses of loyal Toon Army members who have had to put up with this loathsome slug like creature. If only someone could come alone and bury him in a mountain of sea salt!


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