Long live the days of Fernando Torres and Andy Carroll, and January deadline-day 2011, when Chelsea and Liverpool splashed out £85m on two strikers, and brought us all to the edge of our seats.
The 2016 equivalents? Oumar Niasse and Jordan Rhodes – hardly worth the fortnight-long hype that Jim White and the rest of the Sky Sports team gave what is becoming a con of a spectacle.
Middlesbrough outlined their determination to win promotion from the Championship with a £9m deal for Rhodes from Blackburn Rovers, who will apparently get £2m more if Boro reach the Premier League.
Everton spent a reported £13.5m on Niasse from Lokomotiv Moscow. The Senegalese is capable of playing across all of the forward positions, but will not address Roberto Martinez’s defensive concerns.
But these signings will not excite many outside of Teesside and Merseyside, and we were promised more! The Premier League big boys stayed quiet, and Saido Berahino and Alex Teixeira stayed put.
The three-team pursuit of Berahino was over before it had started as West Bromwich Albion batted away bids from Newcastle United and Stoke City, and Tottenham Hotspur never came to the party.
Tottenham’s failure to sign striking support for Harry Kane for the second successive window was one of the biggest disappointments. If you can’t rely on Daniel Levy for a bit of drama, there is no hope.
Manchester United and Liverpool fans would have welcomed new additions, but the Reds gave up on Shakhtar Donetsk attacker Teixeira, and United appeared to show no ambition to buy at all.
Both the North-West giants could have done with strengthening their squads because they are at serious risk of missing out on the top four and the holy grail that is Champions League football.
Even at the other end of the table, Aston Villa nor Sunderland could compensate with some obvious and hilarious panic buying! It really was another underwhelming end to the January transfer window.
Perhaps it is unfair to expect 2011-level incident every year, but 2016 certainly won’t be a deadline day that we remember. Niasse and Rhodes? Bring back Harry Redknapp and his car window!
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