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Gilberto Is Good For Nothing

Arsenal and Brazil midfielder Gilberto has inexplicably violated one of the key delusions maintained by football supporters, that every player must surely know and be in regular contact with every other player from his home nation.

In speaking to Sky Sports, Gilberto shockingly admitted that he hadn’t been life long friends with new arrival and fellow Brazilian Denilson, nor played a instrumental part in his arrival at the London club,

“To be honest I don’t know him, I have heard about him, but I don’t know him that much,”.

“If he is joining Arsenal it is because he is a good player.”

“Arsene is very careful when he tries to bring a player for the team because he has observed him for a long, long time.”

Bah, next we’ll be hearing from players that it wasn’t the lifelong dream to play for our club, and that we’re not ‘massive’.