Sign Him Up!

Stan Collymore on October 4th 2006:

“A month from today I guarantee I will be able to stand side by side with any striker in the country and my physique will be up there with any of them”

Impressive physical stature aside, calendar savvy readers will notice that November 4th has come and gone and still no Collymore return to the Premiership! For some unknown reason Arsenal, Chelsea, Liverpool and Manchester United didn’t form an orderly line to sign a 35 year old striker who hasn’t played for years, with a rumored history of mental health issues.

His one semi-realistic hope was that Martin O’Neill would take a chance and give Stan his dream move to Aston Villa, but that isn’t happening either. In fact, Sam Allardyce has decided even he cannot rejuvenate this aged has-been.

So, sadly, it looks like this really is the end of the road for Stanley Victor Collymore, Premiership footballer. What a shame.