Menu

Please Don’t Leave Us, Jose.

Love or hate him, Jose Mourinho makes the Premiership a more entertaining place. Without him Chelsea likely wouldn’t have broken the Manchester United and Arsenal Premiership stranglehold, Andriy Shevchenko and Shaun Wright Phillips would still have fulfilling lives and Jiri Jarosik and Alexi Smertin would never have gotten their big chance to grace England’s top flight.More importantly, the man’s a born headline maker. From the second he landed on these shores and declared himself “a special one”, everything that comes out of his mouth has been in big letters on the back page. So even as rumours of his departure are dispelled, to even consider life without Jose is a rather grim task.

If the Premiership was a soap opera (see: West Ham) then Jose Mourinho is the villain you love to hate. A bit like Grant Mitchell was on “Eastenders”. Always causing trouble, can’t keep his nose out, can’t keep his mouth shut. But he kept things interesting and, most importantly, the show went downhill after he left.

Which is exactly what could happen to the Premiership. If Guus Hiddink or anyone else short of Vinnie Jones or some sort of unfrozen caveman replaces the outspoken Portugueezer then life as a football supporter will get significantly less interesting, because Mourinho is genuinely irreplaceable. Who else would force a referee into retirement, equate international football with slavery, and outright condemn opposing players in a show of blatant hypocrisy? Gareth Southgate doing battle with Glen Roeder over who is less qualified to manage a Premiership club just doesn’t have the same appeal.

So next time Mourinho gets you all angry, and you curse his dirty big-mouthed Portuguese bones, take a moment to appreciate your sense of outrage. Because if and when Jose goes elsewhere, the Premiership’s going to feel like a ghost town.