David James Hates Steve McClaren

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After collecting his Premiership-record 142nd clean sheet against Aston Villa, surpassing David Seaman (Seaman lolz!!11!!), Portsmouth keeper David James took the opportunity to make sure Steve McClaren never picks him ever again,

“I don’t think Steve McClaren watched, I think there was a documentary on the Discovery channel,” he told The News.

“I’ll keep plugging away, though. From the beginning of the season I said I can only do what I do at Portsmouth. Anything else is out of my control.

“Things are good and I don’t want it to be my last clean sheet this season. It’s obviously very nice to break the record in a selfish manner but you don’t do it without teams.

“Defensively we’ve been very, very strong and you’ve got to take that into consideration. We started off with five clean sheets and carried on from there.”

On form alone, David James probably deserves a place with England. But that’s not the only criteria, England have a host of keepers coming up with potential (Manchester United’s Ben Foster (loan at Watford), Liverpool’s Scott Carson (loan at Charlton)) who should be blooded in England friendlies and qualifying matches to compete with Tottenham’s Paul Robinson. James is almost 37 and there’s no way of knowing how long he can keep this up.

Stevie Mac has got it right by choosing to watch some lions shag.