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Chelsea’s Avram Grant Is Not Winning People Over Anytime Soon

Prior to bumbling unlicensed fool Avram Grant’s tenure at Chelsea, the yardstick to nonsensical madness was legend Bobby Robson. Here are a couple of Bobby Robson classics:

Reporter to Newcastle’s Shola Ameobi: ‘Do you have a nickname?’
Ameobi: ‘No, not really’
Reporter: ‘So what does Bobby Robson call you?’
Ameobi: ‘Carl Cort.’

Sir Bobby to Bryan Robson: “Good morning, Bobby.”
Bryan: “You’re Bobby, I’m Bryan!”

Now it has emerged that Avram Grant has thrown his hat into the ring and wants to be considered as Robson’s equal, and least in terms of dopiness anyway.

The Observer
is claiming that in a team get together before Chelsea’s 2-0 defeat at Manchester United, Grant waltzed in an unveiled the team sheet, seemingly unaware that he had named a line-up with just 10 men. A mystery dressing-room whistle blower has claimed that the hilariously bungling coach described the team’s formation as “4-4-1”.

How on earth will out of favour Chelsea striker Adriy Shevchenko ever make it into the team if they only play “4-4-1”!? One senior player apparently thinks that “Grant does not have the quality to coach a team like this”, and other Chelsea players are considering doing a runner too, can you blame them at this point?