If Liverpool Don’t Beat Everton, They’re A Bit Screwed

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Liverpool’s Benitez has laid it all on the line; if Liverpool don’t beat Everton they’re in a spot of trouble and Rafa seems less and less confidences about his team as the weekend approaches. Benitez has been carping on about Liverpool’s bad form for weeks now, and will tell anyone who’ll listen about the importance of Saturday’s ‘merseygrudge’ game against “small club” Everton. A small solitary tear slowly snaked down the Spaniard’s cheek as he wept on the Liverpool Echo’s shoulder:

“I am really worried about the team over the past few games, because we are not playing at our level,”

Benitez then turned to the Liverpool FC website telling them that:

“Winning a game like this can change everything and we are looking forward to the derby.It’s important for us to win this game. Everton are in a good position in the league and have started the season well.”

Rafa then drifted off into his mid-life crisis bearded dreamland, a dreamland where his brave Liverpool capitulate to the snarling menace of hardworking Tim Cahill, bald and hardworking Lee Carsley, and just plain bald Tommy Gravesen. Rafa said:

“We know it will be a tough and very physical game. We have confidence and the players know how much this match means to our supporters.”

Unlike those other matches, then…