Plump up a cushion, get yourself cup of tea and enjoy the best thing to happen in football since Ronnie Rosenthal hit the bar from six yards out. Jose Mourinho has become involved in playground bullying.
Mourinho, who prior to his dismissal from Chelsea this season had said that he was more “serene” than ever, seems to have flown into a rage when his 11-year-old daughter told him about playground taunts that another boy had made, comparing her with her father.
Kids can be so cruel calling each other the Special One and remarking that an 11-year-old-girl couldn’t get the best out of Andriy Shevchenko.
Mourinho went into the playground at the Â£6,500-a-year school his daughter attends in Setabul, near Lisbon, on Wednesday afternoon and found the boy who had been taunting his daughter, Matilde.
He then appears to have pulled the 12-year-old boy by the ears and gave him a thorough dressing down, as other parents and pupils looked on in bemusement.
Oh for a YouTube clip of that. And it didn’t end there, no really, it gets better.
Mourinho, 44, was then hauled into the office of the headmistress like a naughty schoolboy and made to apologise to his tearful victim and his family.
Isabal Simao, headmistress of St Peter’s School, said that Mourinho appeared truly embarrassed and later wrote to the boy and the school to apologise for his behaviour.
And he won’t be allowed to take part in this years nativity play or play with the big boys until he has written ‘I will not pull children’s ears’ 200 times.
It’s only downhill for football after that.