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Monday’s Idiot Of The Week: Arsenal’s Schizoid Goalie, England’s Newly Potty-trained Manager, and the Spanish git who ruined it for Scotland.

Each week we’ll be picking some nominees for Idiot Of The Week. Maybe they locked themselves in the toilet rather than watch the last ten minutes of a game, maybe they were photographed with vegetable in their bottom or maybe they’re just your team’s crappest footballer. Whatever the reason, here are our picks and we want to hear yours in the comments.

It wasn’t much of a tight call with last weeks nominees, Wayne Rooney looked like less and less of an idiot as the days drew on, mainly because he’s now enrolled for some GCSE’s. Joey Barton, however was crowned last weeks idiot of the week, for his attempt to circumcise Dickson Ethuhu’s penis, and for showing a total lack of remorse after the event…

This week’s nominees are:

Idiot A Steve “Sh*tbreak” McClaren – A nominee for two weeks running; mainly for playing Mickey Owen in a meaningless kickabout and then watching him get injured but also for admitting after Israel’s victory over Russia that he spent the final ten minutes of the game barricaded in the toilet.

Idiot B – Spanish referee Manuel Gonzalez who blew for a free kick to Italy when in actually fact Alan Hutton had been shunted off the ball by Giorgi Chiellini. The subsequent free kick by Pirlo, fell onto Panucci’s head and then into the goal. A cruel ending and made even more painful by the myopic decision by Gonzalez.

Idiot C Jens Lehmann – another week another series of schizoid acts; from press conferences where he clearly exhibits multiple personalities to making obscene gestures to the Germany fans when they call for his substitution. Get this man a straightjacket. Pronto.