It’s all my fault!
[cheesy intro] My name’s Andy and I support Liverpool.
This is short and sweet but I thought I’d share it with you all.
It all started when I had a call from a mobile number I didn’t recognise about an hour ago from a very friendly chap who identified himself as Alan Brown from Liverpool Football Club. Now as a Liverpool fan, this was very exciting for me. However, what was strange was that he was calling me back. Now, I’ve not called LFC lately. After a little bit of excited confusion, very strange emotion to have, I called Mr Brown back.
I introduced myself as Andy Morris and that I was returning his call. We also established that we were both doing very well today. I have a feeling that since I had a call from LFC, I was possibly doing better than he was, but he works for them, so it is debateable. Then we got down to it. He asked if I called one of his reception girls earlier today. Slightly confused, I told him that I hadn’t. He then asked if I worked for Middlesboro FC, even more confused, I said no. He then said “Did you call Middlesboro saying you were from Liverpool asking about one of their players?” and that’s when the penny dropped. I told him that it’s my birthday this week (on Monday but I don’t think Alan will mind) and that I’ve been getting weird calls like this all week as my friends have been making a number of calls like this from my phone. I apologised to him and, to Alan’s credit, he just laughed and wished me happy birthday.
Immediately after, I spoke to my friend who told me that he had in fact, called Boro, got transferred to their training ground and spoke to a “lovely young lady called Kelly or Lucy or something like that”. My friend told Kelly or Lucy that HE was Andy Morris (he wishes) and that he was calling on behalf of Liverpool to enquire into the availability of Tuncay. Kelly or Lucy told him/me that everyone was in a meeting about but she would get someone to call him/me back later. He/I said that he/I was in meetings all day but if they call my mobile and leaves a message I’ll get back to them. She said ok and that she’ll see if she can get Gareth to call him/me back. My friend said that his first thought was “There’s no point in telling me who’s going to be calling me back love, I don’t know who works there”, but then he twigged on that Kelly or Lucy meant none other than Gareth Southgate. He can be quite slow.
So, in short, I don’t know if Boro have responded and said that he is available or just sounded Liverpool out about me. If we do sign Tuncay, I want 5% for arranging the whole thing.
Once again, I’m sorry Alan and Kelly or Lucy and even Gareth, if it got to you.