Newcastle United Owner Calls Off Sale and Names Permanent Manager (Finds Time to Eat Lard Also)

Mr Ashley manages to make two decisions in one morning and still finds time to consume as much lard as possible.

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Sports - March 01, 2008

Chris Hughton has been named as the permanent manager of Newcastle, while the Magpies have also been taken off the market.

Hughton has been rewarded with a contract until the end of the 2010/11 season after guiding the Magpies to the top of the Championship.

At the same time, the club confirmed Barry Moat’s takeover bid has fallen through after he failed to match owner Mike Ashley’s £80million asking price.

Ashley has now taken Newcastle off the market and will put a further £20m into the club this week as the Magpies push to win promotion back to the top flight at the first attempt.

A statement on the club’s official website explained Newcastle’s long-term plan – including renaming St James’ Park.

It read: “Whilst confirming these two matters, Newcastle United now aims to move forward on and off the pitch.

“The club aims to maximise its commercial revenues; this includes renegotiating its club sponsor and kit deal, which expire at the end of this season, as well as welcoming offers for the stadium naming rights for next season.” (Sky Sports)

My my, Mr. Ashley has had a busy morning. Deciding to take the club off the market and confirming Chris Hughton as a permanent boss whilst no doubt simultaneously downing packets of Lard can’t be easy.

On a serious note I am not sure any of the Toon Army faithful will be dancing on the ceiling Lionel Ritchie style with this news. Clearly the club is doing just fine in the Championship but that is surely the least the club should expect and whilst the appointment of Hughton as the permanent boss gives the club a little more stability I don’t see it really meaning much long term.

Mr Odious & Obese (Ashley) has almost ruined the club and now with an upturn of form in the second tier he would hope to fool anyone stupid enough to fall for it, that the club is in a fine state. In an ideal world the Geordie side will win the title and then a very rich man will buy the club from the idiot who runs it now and then they can resume their Premier League status with a glowing future ahead, however the reality is that the longer Mike Ashley remains at the club the more likely they are to fall even further from grace.

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