Throughout Newcastle United’s stilted performance at Old Trafford last night I kept asking myself the same question. No, I wasn’t thinking “When will the commentator make the usual reference to Paul Scholes’ inability to tackle”, although that first occurred after about twelve minutes. What I was asking myself is. “What is that on Joey Barton’s face?”. In case you missed it, the slightly unhinged midfielder is now sporting a tash’ that implies the England hopeful has just stepped out of a time machine via the 1930s. There seems no rhyme or reason to it although I suspect the idea is to offer himself a thinly veiled disguise so that he isn’t tarred with the brush of being ‘Joey Barton’ and therefore avoiding any undeserved cautions, which lo and behold he received for a nothing challenge on Nani. Watch this space as Barton attempts to grow his hairy friend into a proper handlebar job.