The ten funniest and best quotes from ‘I Think Therefore I Play’.
Italian legend Andrea Pirlo’s new book, ‘I think Therefore I play’, has finally been translated into English and released on Tuesday, and we have compiled the ten best quotes that will only go on to push him deeper into fans hearts everywhere.
10. Pirlo on the Playstation
“After the wheel, the PlayStation is the best invention of all time. And ever since it’s existed, I’ve been Barcelona, apart from a brief spell way back at the start when I’d go Milan.”
9. Pirlo on Antonio Cassano
“Take someone like (Parma striker) Antonio Cassano. He says he’s slept with 700 women but he doesn’t get picked for Italy any more. Can he really be happy? I wouldn’t be.”
8. Pirlo on meeting Guardiola
“I didn’t need to be asked twice. In I went. The room was furnished in sober fashion and there was some red wine on the table. “Always a good start,” I muttered to myself. Thankfully the most envied coach in the word didn’t hear me. His way of speaking is very similar to mine – not really tenor style, let’s say. “Make yourself comfortable, Andrea,” he began, his Italian absolutely perfect.”
7. Pirlo on Istanbul 2005
“I thought about quitting because, after Istanbul, nothing made sense any more. The 2005 Champions League final simply suffocated me.”
6. Pirlo on Real Madrid
“I pictured myself in that white jersey. Pristine, and at the same time aggressive; a mean streak running through its unusual purity. My thoughts often wandered to the Santiago Bernabeu, the Temple, a ground that struck terror into opponents. Bruised and battered slaves at the king’s banquet.”
5. Pirlo on Sir Alex Ferguson
“Even Sir Alex Ferguson, the purple-nosed manager who turned Manchester United into a fearsome battleship, couldn’t resist the temptation. He’s a man without blemish, but he ruined that purity just for a moment when it came to me. A fleeting shabbiness came over the legend that night.”
4. Prilo on Roy Hodgson
“He called me Pirla (a term used in Milan dialect roughly translated as dickhead), perhaps understanding my true nature more than the other managers. We went through four coaches that year (1999). I’d wake up in the morning and not remember who my coach was.”
3. Pirlo on Jerzy Dudek
“To most people’s minds, the reason we lost on penalties was Jerzy Dudek – that jackass of a dancer who took the mickey out of us by swaying about on his line and then rubbed salt into the wound by saving our spot kicks.”
2. Pirlo on Gennaro Gattuso
“You could see the red mist coming down and he just wasn’t able to hide it. We could tell what was coming and so we’d commandeer all the knives. Gattuso would grab a fork and try to stick it in us.”
1. Pirlo on pre-match warm ups
“It’s nothing but masturbation for conditioning coaches.”