Latest Transfer Rumours: Sidwell, Brown, Malouda, Tevez, Torres and Bramble.

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The world of Premiership transfer gossip is full of nonsense, but some nonsense is more interesting that the other nonsense. Speculation is rife in the likes of the Mirror, Daily Mail, Times, Sun and… err… Tribal Football all do their best to predict and/or completely make up the future.

Here’s our opinion on the Premiership transfer rumours we’ve read in the papers and around the net… and if you have any thoughts, pop em in the comments.

CaughtOffside Says: Sidwell alongside parker would give Newcastle a nice pair of box-to-box midfielders, with massive holes left all over the centre of the park as they run about chasing every ball. Great entertainment, good going forward, and guaranteed to exasperate some defensive frailties.

Sunderland will move for Manchester United defender Wes Brown if they are promoted, and Roy Keane also wants to entice Damien Duff to make a less-than-popular switch from Newcastle.

CaughtOffside Says: Brown is one of Ferguson’s favourites since he came through the ranks, regardless of form or fitness. So we find it tough to believe he’ll move unless Fergie wants to help his old captain out. Duff moving seems even less likely, but then we’ve never had to say “No” to Roy Keane.

Lyon president Jean-Michel Aulas confirmed yesterday that “two or three” of Gerard Houllier’s star-studded team would be allowed to leave after receiving enquiries from “big clubs”. Manchester United and Arsenal are both linked with winger Florent Malouda.

CaughtOffside Says: Wenger said he’d only be adding some “super-class” players to his squad, which Malouda – while good – doesn’t really seem to fit. We’re also not convinced that he’s the man Ferguson will tab to help replace Ryan Giggs in the long term. So two thumbs down from us on this rumour.

Portsmouth are preparing a £2m bid for Israel striker Toto Tamuz, currently at Beitar Jerusalem.

CaughtOffside Says: Will be interesting to see how many other Israeli players are suddenly thrown into the rumour mill after…well… being on the pitch at the same time that England were sh*t.

West Ham will try to buy Argentine striker Carlos Tevez outright – providing the club avoid relegation this season.

CaughtOffside Says:Makes sense, the fans love Carlos and Carlos seems to love the fans. Completely contrary to what we thought when Tevezcherano first arrived, we can actually see Tevez staying if the Hammers stay up.

With rumours of a 40 million transfer kitty, Liverpool are firming up their interest Atletico Madrid’s £20m-rated hitman Fernando Torres.

CaughtOffside Says: Well, obviously.

Fulham, Portsmouth and Ipswich all want to sign Newcastle defender Titus Bramble.

CaughtOffside Says: Please go to Fulham, please go to Fulham. The prospect of Zat Knight and Titus Bramble ever playing together is comedy gold to be cherished.