David Beckham’s Paymasters Crush His Manchester United, Arsenal, and Chelsea Dreams.

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The LA Galaxy are keeping hold of David Beckham and he will never EVER be permitted to set foot in a Premier League club again – MWU-HA-HA-HA!
The Sun reports that David Beckham’s “hopes of making a return to the Premier League have been dashed by LA Galaxy.”
Many clubs have been having a sniff around the English superstar, thinking thoughts that they shouldn’t about whisking him off on loan but today LA Galaxy owner Tim Leiweke said:

“It will never happen, David is our property. For David to play in England in the off-season is not in his best interests or ours.”

Hang on a sec, ‘mate’ – who the hell do you think you are? He’s your property? We’ve never heard such tripe – David Beckham is as English as jellied eels, Reebok Classics, underage pregnancies, and Anne Widdecombe, and as such is a national treasure.

No word yet on whether the British government will be sending a delegation over to LA to reclaim OUR property.

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